no hear no speak therefore no see

please please please let me go ask them my questions
it does not have to be all the people
just let me ask one person
let one human have the answer
i am a bad listener
i know where i want to go
but did You tell me not to go there?
my heart aches for a land far from here.
why must i stay
and watch so many choose to die
when those who do not know life
are longing for the cure
i cant even speak right
my words have done more tearing down
than any building up

tighter they pull the fold of the blinds
do You want me to stop speaking?
anger brews from within them
how haughty they become because of my slow speech
they say, "quick quick give me an answer so i can prove you wrong!"
just let them overcome me
and sweep me away.
my heart continues to grown
why does sorrow constantly follow me?

here is a person
look! over there another.
speak
no be quiet!
silence
no yell!
oh back and forth the debate in me
i will be silent
no i wont
i like chaff which the wind blows away

but you and you and you
all of you have shown what lies in your heart
forgive me for being a burden
someday i will be gone from your land
and into another
you will hear no more of me
i hope and pray, that wherever else i go, i will be the servant the King has called me to be
what keeps me hear?
why do i fly not, but shed many tears?
if i cannot communicate to these people
if i am still a child here
what makes me think i am ready to go to another land in this world?
being mature and complete
able to talk to anyone
speaking as a bold lion
no
i am not ready
for i have forgotten the training of my youth
now i must start over
and here i stay
while others refuse to hear me
so i refuse to speak
then nobody sees

oh Father.
forgive us for our stubbornness
let Your Light uncover this darkness that consumes us
Your way is not complicated
yet many follow the ways of the pharisees and sadducees making up stumbling blocks
i will race
you have set me free
i do believe it
so now...though my flesh is afraid...i will speak
give me the words to say
for my thoughts are but a breath