the lost song

i hear those notes
the chords form
and the memory of you comes to me

i prayed you would find life
life starred you in the eyes
life drums on your hearts door
so that you may have music evermore
but you choose to continue to die
the music stops
where is the beat that made your blood run through your veins?

you choose to die
i choose to live
i cannot stop living
i must keep singing
i play the melody
alone with no harmony
and some days when all is quiet i hear the lost song
the one you showed me
yet how could you ever think i would trade life for the wrong?

my life would shatter
if i were ever silent on what really mattered
you begged for silence
so silence you receive

i am here
you are gone
gone with the lost song
no tears i weep
but my heart cannot keep
from crying aloud
for my God to save you

how are you? [tangent time]

this could be one of the most frustrating questions for me.
are: verb. definition: to be.
so how am i?
to be something. but im not constantly something.
then again i am human. and i am christian.
so i am constantly both of those and there is no changing that.
but my actions can like to tattle on me for not behaving as a christian.
then again the title christian is one this world gave to disciples. and now many who are not true disciples claim to be christian. christian meaning Christ-like. but to be a disciple is to follow Jesus step by step by step. and when some say christian that is what they mean. but for others christian may only mean: one who does good deeds like that Jesus-guy.
how are you?
i am not good. no one is good but the Father.
i am not well but everything is well with my soul because of the peace that Jesus has placed in my heart.
how are you?
i am not terrible. yes im human. but im not fully terrible. i was thinking about this the other day. there is no equal to Jesus. this many people have known forever and a day. but as i was pondering on it i realized just how much of NO equal there really was...or is it is not? i cant even be perfectly human bc Jesus has got me beat there. and it's AWESOME! there isnt an evil that will overcome me nor can anyone become perfectly evil. because only God is perfect :D bwahahaha!
how am i?
i am not an emotion. those things can and do change rapidly. and sometimes it hurts us when people change from an emotion of merriment/friendliness to bitterness and and anger. or vice versa.
how am i?
how am i what?
how am i me? well God made me who i am. and my flesh, this dark world and little evils are out to make sure i behave as i am not. but Thank you Jesus for grace to set me free from all of that so i can be who You created me to be in You.
therefore:
how am i?
i am not the Great I Am-but He is full of awe! and indescribable and makes me grin!- but i am who i am no more no less. and i cant complain. and i would like a different question please!