The Lord HAS done great things for me! And now, at last, I can clearly see!

For over seven years I suffered from chronic pain. It began when a family member told me I was worthless and didn’t do anything to help around the house. So to prove this person wrong I carried twenty gallons of paint up a hill to his/her truck- AT ONE TIME. Ten gallons in each hand. For all you strong people out there you may scoff and say that’s nothing. But for an average sophomore-in-college-young-lady it was quite a feat. In the process of trying to prove my worth I tore all the muscles in my upper back. 

The following day I decided to wear high heals to campus (probably because I had to perform that day) while carrying a 40 pound backpack. But this is only the beginning of my foolishness causing me harm.

 A “friend” offered to rub my aching back.  This “friend” then chopped my shoulder blade with all his/her might. I don’t mean the continuous chop that makes you go “uuuuuuuuh”. It was like a dagger was driven into my muscles with such force the wind was knocked out of me and I had no feeling from my back down to my leg. This “friend”, and another person who was around, proceed to laugh as I lay on the floor withering in pain. 

For over a year the pain slowly eased. I probably went to get a massage or two to help. But within a years time I went white water rafting and pulled a muscle behind my knee or above it. That same year I was in a car accident where the other driver ran a red light. Whiplash from the wreck brought all the previously mentioned pain swarming back like never before as well as causing neck pain.  At this point pain now began to be ever present from my neck down to my knee.

 A random chiropractor office in town called me up shortly after the wreck knowing I had been in a wreck. That was creepy. These are the types of doctors who I like to call ambulance chasers. They look at police reports to find out who they can con money out of next and know just what to say in order to overcharge you for their services. I saw past their false caring words. I also knew a massage was not going to help this time and since I still had insurance I was able to go to physical therapy. 

The PTs gave me a stretching routine to do but it would only eased the pain for 30 minutes and then the pain would come back with rage. Was I to live a life of having to constantly stretch? (There is a metaphor for ya.) Maybe it was because I was overweight… Ha! Looking back at photos of myself from during this time I’m enraged at my then self-view. I looked goooood. But I wasn’t a beanpole so obviously I was obese. (joke) 

Later in my college life I pulled a lower back muscle while walking up stairs and wearing a 70 pound backpack. Wonder how that could have happened, eh? I thought I was paralayzed for life after this injury. Three days passed and I was finally able to move/walk “normal”. At this time I had no insurance so there was no going to see a doctor for help. 

There was also a time where I went hiking and for some reason I fell. My fall was broken by a jagged tree root that went into my lower back/bum. About the same spot I had pulled the muscle when walking up campus stairs a year prior.   I still have red marks from where it injured me. And there have been different times I have rolled my ankles or bent my foot wrong.  Pain was like a gnat buzzing in my ear. Reminding me it was there up in my neck all the way down to my ankle. 

Now, a couple of years ago I went to one of those churches that believe in the Holy Spirit and His power to heal. And I don’t mean, “Oh, God, let the medicine work” healing.(Nothing against those who take medicine for healing. That’s another blog for another time…and another blogger.) I mean they pray and Holy Spirit brings healing kind of healing. At the end of the service the pastor asked if there was anyone who was in need of prayer for healing for any reason. I spoke up/raised my hand. Maybe this would be the day the pain would finally stop.  So as people prayed over/for me one woman stopped praying and looked at me and asked, “Are your hips out of alignment?” I replied, “I don’t know. Why?” Note, I was sitting so no one would be able to tell from that. “I think your hips are out of alignment. You need to go see a chiropractor.” 

*gasp*

 A chiropractor? I told her how I was scared of chiropractors. I grew up with my family preaching the word of chiropractors being corrupt and cause damage to your health.  Thus, I didn’t go. 

For the next two or three years the pain grew stronger. I was covered in pain and with it its fellow symptoms: depression, sorrow, upset stomach, weight gain, lack of focus. (As for the latter, people accused me of being add/adhd but I think it was my subconscious trying not to focus on the pain). I was miserable!  

Know this: I would seldom take any kind of medicine to alleviate the pain. I knew this was a pain too deep for medicine to help and I would only take ibuprofen on days when it was really bad. And by really bad I mean I couldn’t stand or sit for more than 30 minutes without feeling exhausted.  It would ease the pain to where I could focus a little bit better and get stuff done.

 

This past Thanksgiving all those symptoms were yelling at me. I was being overcome with it all. I was afraid I had some kind of food allergy, but, no matter what I ate my digestion system would be upset. I had no energy or motivation to do anything except bond with the couch. 

 I was upset at myself. This is not the person I wanted to be. I was forcing myself to go out and do things just to prove the pain and depression wrong. They of course would retaliate with a deep emotional exhaustion.  

On one particular outing this past December I went to work out with a friend. Now this friend is one of those people who just smiles the entire time she is at the gym. Maybe I am the only one that when I’m at the gym I’m overwhelmed with the thought of: "I am never going to master all this. I’m never going to be strong enough." But when you work out with a friend who is happy to be there and thinks it can be a fun time, smiles can be contagious. 

We were going about lifting weights, working the machines. She, of course, is leading this workout session. We get to one weight machine and she demonstrates how we are going to strengthen our calf muscles. Sweet! I know this one. It’s like 48s. I used to do this all the time back in high school. I would get compliments on my calf muscles. I’ve got this!

To do this exercise one must extended her legs to where her knees are slightly bent then proceed to push on the flat part of the machine with her toes/balls of her feet. It’s ridiculously easy. Yet, I couldn’t do it. 

My friend was trying to explain it to me and I was like “Thank you, Captain Obvious!” So for a minute or two my friend is watching me struggle with THE MOST BASIC EXERCISE EVER and then speaks, “Are your hips out of alignment?” *You’ve got to be kidding me* “Ya know,” I answer, “Your distant cousin got a word from the Lord a couple of years ago that they were...so, maybe? Why?”  “Because one leg is completely straight and the other leg the knee is slightly bent.” I was dumbfounded. 

That’s it! I had to get a chiropractor. She suggested one that was super fancy and far away from my neck of the woods. Being an unemployed licensed teacher that wasn’t going to work for me…But I had to find another. 

Who else could suggest a safe and wise chiropractor- one who was honest and not an ambulance chaser? Obviously my hippy friend would know someone…okay she’s not a hippy but she’s super into homeopathic medicine/life. My nickname for her is Mother Earth and I hope one day I can be as cool a woman as she is. She gave me the chiropractor information…again, for I had inquired of this before, years ago, but didn’t go-Because fear hinders people from healing. I called this chiropractor. It was Christmas weekend. No answer. I called the Wednesday after Christmas. Was it a coincidence I wore my Ironman pajama shirt the night before I contacted Dr. Jerviss? Different spelling, same pronunciation(at least if you have a southern accent), but an extreme help just like Ironman’s computer nonetheless. She answered and said to come on over to the office that day! No more waiting.

 I called the workout buddy and told her what was happening. What was this feeling stirring in my soul? As I drove to the WellHouse tears were on the brim of my eyes but it wasn’t from sorrow. At long last I was going to the door at which God had said I could find physical healing. Boy was I stubborn at adhering to His voice!

Dr. Jerviss was a little dumbfounded as I told her of all the different injuries I had had that caused me pain. I left out the emotional details because I didn’t want to dwell on any bitterness at this appointment. She said when I walked in she wouldn’t have known all that had happened to me. It reminded me of a compliment someone had given me by how I kept smiling even though I was in constant pain.

She proceeded to adjust me. There was one point where I felt something deep in my core adjust. It was at that moment I felt the depression leave me. I could breathe again! I mean, I never stopped breathing, but, now it didn’t seem like an effort to enjoy being alive and breathing. 

After my walk-in appointment I went to have coffee with my friend. I couldn’t stop smiling. I told her she probably hadn’t seen me this happy in years. She remarked, “Girl, this isn’t happiness. This is joy!” My smile was no longer a masque but a reflection of my soul. 

Of course, I felt an immediate relief after being adjusted, but having lived with over seven years of pain I will be responsible with this healing process and continue to go see Dr. Jerviss for 6 more weeks and then a monthly visit and eventually get to point where I only go as needed. 

All the rage, bitterness, and depression are gone. With all those awful symptoms of pain gone I feel like there is good soil for the fruit of the Spirit to grow in my life. Anger seems like a foreign emotion to me. Once more mercy and compassion can dwell in me. Memories of regret are being replaced with seeing how God was working around me all along. 

When I stand it doesn’t feel like the room is at an angle. It isn’t an effort to have good posture. I wish I could go back and do my senior vocal recital now that I can stand with confidence. Fear has been crushed. All the ways the enemy has tried to break me (literally) have been defeated. 

Praise God for allowing his creation to learn about how the body works and being able to help one another out. 

What I want you to take away from all of this:

 God is alive. And He is in the business of bringing healing in surprising ways. I mean this isn’t the first time in the history of mankind he brought healing to a person in an odd way. Go check out the account of Naaman in 2 Kings 5:1-19. And then, let’s not forget the blind guy in John 9(yep. The entire chapter! Read it!) 

The Bible is filled with these accounts of the Lord healing in mysterious ways. I mean even the way he chose to heal our captive souls wasn’t what was expected by people. But if we want the healing He offers, it’s going to take an act of obedience to go where he called us to find that healing as well as surrender of fear of the things of this world. Like Naaman and myself, the Lord might send us to a place our old selves detest. It is in that place we will find life and be made new. When we go we finally find peace. We can breathe again and our hearts are open to Holy Spirit coming into our lives and restoring our souls.

At first I was going to keep my story of God healing my back on the down low. But I am filled with too much joy to keep it a secret. My family may ridicule me for going to a chiropractor. (They don’t know yet, but it won’t be long after I post this blog that they will know.) Others may ridicule me for giving God all this credit for healing. I can't contain this good news! I want to proclaim the Lords goodness forever!

 I once was a captive to pain. Pain caused my mouth to be filled with vile words and complaints. Now that kind of talk seems odd to my mouth. Now my heart is filled with laughter and my mouth is filled with songs of joy!

 May all who read this seek the Lord and find true restoration. 

Psalm 126

Zion’s Restoration

A song of ascents.

When the Lord restored the fortunes of Zion,
we were like those who dream.
Our mouths were filled with laughter then,
and our tongues with shouts of joy.
Then they said among the nations,
“The Lord has done great things for them.”
 The Lord had done great things for us;
we were joyful.

Restore our fortunes, Lord,
like watercourses in the Negev.
Those who sow in tears
will reap with shouts of joy.
Though one goes along weeping,
carrying the bag of seed,
he will surely come back with shouts of joy,
carrying his sheaves.